Dr. Zodiac – our resident psychic, soothsayer and general purpose mystic – spent the entire weekend in a supernatural funk.
Why? He has learned that the stars – those mean ole critters who love picking on mankind for the fun of it – have been working on a plan to torment everyone in the state of Arkansas. That plan involves bringing in Josh McDaniels to replace the disgraced Bobby Petrino as head football coach of the Razorbacks. The good doctor said that only the stars could think of something so devious and pull the cosmic strings necessary to inspire a university to make such an insane move.
“They’re kind of like Hannibal Smith in terms of making plans come together,” Zodiac said. “Yeah, kind of like Hannibal Smith. Only evil. McDaniels? Really?”
Fortunately, Zodiac pulled himself together long enough to commune with the stars and divine our horoscopes for the week. So, what’s in store? Read on and find out for yourself.