Monday, January 5, 2009

The Hawg's gift to the world

As I've mentioned here before, I turn 40-years-old in June and I'm mad about it.

I figure I'm angry for the reason most people about to enter middle age are irate. Yes, I haven't achieved much of anything in my 40 years on this earth in spite of having some potential and too much education.

Ah, but I vow to achieve greatness on my 40th birthday. How? I, The Hawg, hereby swear to either develop a new interjection or modify one that's fallen out of vogue and inflict it on the world!

I initially thought a new obscenity would be good and that might be just the thing for people who want to yell something while angry but are bored with the limitations of the English language. However, my new interjection doesn't have to be obscene -- it merely has to be something unique that angry people can yell when frustrated. One that sums up an emotional state in a scant few syllables and makes all who utter it feel a little better.

I figure on assembling a team of people who are given to getting angry and yelling things. That team will help me develop the perfect interjection. I've already enlisted the support of a foul-mouthed fellow at my office and my brother (a redhead, and we know how mad they get, right?) More team members are sure to follow in the weeks to come.

What kind of interjection will my crack team develop? Will it be something so foul that a kid can utter it in school and get thrown out for a year? Will it be an anglicized version of some particularly nasty German curse? Will it not be profane at all and merely be an old chestnut that has fallen out of favor and needs to be reintroduced?

The sky's the limit here, so who knows what we'll come up with over the next few months? The only rule my crack team of interjection experts will have to follow is that it can't be blasphemous. Hey, I'm a Methodist and blasphemy just isn't cool.

My birthday is June 16, so I figure on introducing my anger-relieving interjection at that time (I'll be so mad when that cursed 40th birthday arrives that I may use my new word all day long). Stay tuned. I'm sure we'll come up with something that will catch on quick and sweep the planet.

14 comments:

Wendy said...

Hey, I want to be on your list of beta testers. :) And I'm a redhead, too!

Anonymous said...

I am waiting with baited breath. Personally, I would prefer something I could yell in front of a crowd of children without horrifying their parents.

Lyndon said...

I'd help you yell, if I hadn't lost my voice. Can i waggle my finger at people instead?

40 isn't as bad as it used to be! So consider it the new 30. So what's this talk about you getting old?

Patricia Rockwell said...

A good swear word needs lots of hissy and hard consonant sounds--like "schmuck." You can really get your teeth into this word and draw it out and spit it with gusto.

Rick (Ratty) said...

I can't wait to find out what it is. I need something new to add to my vocabulary for when I'm at work.

Anonymous said...

Looking forward to your creation. I'm over 40 and past due for a new interjection. You're never too old to share. :-D

Yeo KeeHui said...

I can't wait to see. I'm 48.

HawgWyld said...

Wendy -- Yes, you can certainly be on the list. I already have a couple of interjections I'm playing around with, in fact.

Anne -- As we move along, I'm thinking of having both a profane and non-profane interjection.

Lyndon -- Waggle away, hoss. It wasn't long ago when 40 seemed so damned old. I still rather view things that way.

Patricia -- Good point!

Ratty -- I've about used up the world's supply of interjections at work. I could use a new one, too.

Rebecca -- Believe it or not, I figure on actually doing some research. That's just sad...

Yeokeehui -- I hope you handled turning 40-years-old with more grace than I will.

Da Old Man said...

You know I'm all about the yelling, whether said expeltive is naughty or just plain colorful.
I would suggest if you want to bring back an old chestnut, read some old dime western novels. They were full of old fashioned gibberish. Or, possibly TV Land has a Gunsmoke Marathon where you could pick up lingo from days gone by.

Anonymous said...

Hey,
I turn 40 in 21 days. Hooray! I am so excited I could just plotz!
I really want to hear your new interjection. Right now I use ones that are slightly off color, but not profane. Will it be open to all users then, or do we have to pay a word use subscription fee? How will you hunt down pirated words?

Paul Eilers said...

Hawg - The dad on the movie, "A Christmas Story" should be recommended viewing in order to help you in this area.

HawgWyld said...

Da Old Man -- Good idea. There's nothing like authentic, frontier gibberish, is there?

Tim -- The Hawg is a generous soul. Everyone can use my word for free. Yes, it'll be my small contribution to our great culture.

PurpleGreenPops -- Great idea, Paul. My favorite interjection from the father, of course, was "Notafinga!"

Anonymous said...

LOL...40 really ain't so bad. Trust me, it's not. 50 is gonna be the birthday that will break this camel's back.

Looking forward to your new obscenity. That should be interesting. ha ha

HawgWyld said...

Lala -- Well, I may have developed a ton of them by then.

Want to test market some?