M&M'S Premiums aren't half bad

I've always hated M&M'S.

Now, to be fair, I'm not a big fan of milk chocolate. Most of it tastes like cheap chocolate with something to hide. M&M'S tastes like the manufacturers found the cheapest milk chocolate on the planet, spruced it up with a candy shell that comes in various colors and inflicted it on an unsuspecting public. I've always considered M&M'S to be the Chicken McNuggets of the candy world in that I'd probably get physically ill if I knew what was really used to make the stuff.

When I learned that M&M'S were developed during World War II to give to American troops, I assumed that meant the Nazis developed them to stuff down prisoners of war. I'm still not convinced that isn't the case.

Hey, you can wrap substandard milk chocolate in a candy shell all you want and it still tastes like garbage. Go ahead and add a peanut in the center and you've still got low grade milk chocolate surrounded by a candy shell that just tastes like "sweet" and nothing else. The only thing more disgusting than a bunch of M&M'S is a sack full of the slightly more noxious Reese's Pieces (made popular by the lead character in E.T. the Extraterrestrial, another hated product of junk culture).

M&M'S have always been vile, but I found some the other day that aren't half bad -- M&M'S Premiums. I've actually found myself enjoying the Mocha and Raspberry Almond varieties of the stuff. I found some on sale at Kroger's yesterday and picked up a box. I still hate the standard M&M'S, but these Premiums things are pretty good.

The only drawback I can see to these things is that the old slogan -- "They melt in your mouth, not in your hand" -- doesn't really apply. That's OK, though, because they taste just fine.

Besides, that famous slogan is rather a lie, anyway. I've seen more than one kid with various colors melted to his hand after going through a bag of M&M'S. Everything about the standard M&M is a big, fat lie. The Premiums, however, are very impressive. Give them a shot.