Walker is a Jedi!

As I mentioned the other night, I've got a nasty case of the flu.

So I'm staying home for a work for a couple of days and that's a bad thing. Why? Giving me time to think can only result in something obnoxious.

Yes, I've wondered if I got that nasty bird flu, whether anyone but me thinks it's brutal when they clear the homeless out of downtown Little Rock when Bill Clinton comes to town, why I bothered with signing up for the "do not call" list when people delight in calling and waking me up anyway, etc.

I also watch a lot of television. I always have watched a lot of television, but I overdose on the stuff when I'm home sick. So I started thinking about the shows I'm watching in addition to my other bits of musing.

Here's what I've come up with -- Walker is a Jedi with a cowboy hat. Yeah, that's right.

Think about it. A Jedi or two is a force to be reckoned with and the same is true of Walker. I've watched Walker, Texas Ranger for years and I've seen Chuck Norris do some incredible things in that time. For example, he filled in during a NASCAR race and won, can fly an airplane or helicopter with no trouble, he's dispersed an angry, torch-wielding mob and routinely fights his way through gangs.

Also, let's not forget the Jedi preferred to fight with something other than blasters. Walker had rather beat someone senseless than shoot at them. Yeah, there's some similarity there, right?

Let's not forget that the Jedi draw their powers from the mystical Force. He might not have the Force, but Walker is in touch with Native American mysticism and, through it, has managed to travel back in time, locate missing people, find the truth of a case, etc.

And remember how people who get too close to Jedi get in trouble? Luke Skywalker's friends were led into traps at least a couple of times so that Luke might show up and save them. We know how that goes -- Darth Vader would step out, try to convert Luke and then we were off to light saber-battle city. You'll find plenty of bad guys out there trying to use Walker's friends against him, too.

Of course, there are a couple of differences. For one thing, Walker subscribes to the notion of moral absolutism and has no trouble dealing harshly with people who are clearly evil. Things weren't so black and white in Star Wars, were they?

Additionally, that Luke feller sure spent a lot of time whining. Walker wouldn't have put up with that kind of nonsense for a minute. He'd beat Luke like a redheaded stepchild, in fact.

There you go. I'm sure I'll come up with some more useless nonsense before my flu runs its course. I apologize in advance for that.