Thursday, April 16, 2009

Don't mess with Texas

Things seem to get odder every day in this great republic.

The latest bit of oddness involves a story I read on CNN in which Texas Gov. Rick Perry said secession is possible. That's right -- the governor of Texas, while addressing an angry "tea party crowd" in Austin on Wednesday -- said his state might one day get fed up and secede from the Union should the federal government not change its ways.

Of course, Perry didn't suggest such a possibility is likely, but he did say such a thing could come to pass. That's a hell of a notion folks.

When you add to that notion a tongue-in-cheek column in WorldNetDaily column in which none other than the great Chuck Norris suggested he may run for president of Texas, you've got a heck of a hypothetical scenario, don't you? Just imagine waking up one morning, opening up the newspaper and reading that Texas had seceded from the Union and had elected Walker, Texas Ranger as its president.

Incredible, huh? Would the newly-liberated country still be called Texas or would her people switch the name of the new republic to The Nation of Awesome (and insist that it always be printed in a bold font)? What impact would an independent Texas have on the rest of the nation? Would more states follow suit and declare their independence? Would other states join The Nation of Awesome and form a new confederacy or would some states declare independence and form their own sovereign countries (if so, my vote for the new name of Arkansas is Hawgland)? Would Norris and his military start attacking and annexing states on the Texas borders? The possibilities are endless.

If Texas secedes and elects Norris as president, I might have to abandon my beloved Arkansas and go help out The Nation of Awesome. Of course, any government led by Norris would have at least two cabinet positions dedicated to maintaining law and order in extreme and entertaining ways. I'm not sure who would be picked to be the Secretary of Kicking Ass, but I'd want the title of Secretary of Taking Names. Yes, we could run around The Nation of Awesome kicking ass and taking names and that activity would, no doubt, keep us very busy.

Seriously, however, I do love the state of Texas and regard it as second on only my native Arkansas as the best state in the union. My wife and I both have a lot of family down there and Texas is, well, different. How different? Back in 2001, the popular thing for states to do was to ban smoking in whatever areas were deemed "public." What were they arguing over in Texas at the time? Whether it should be against the law for passengers to drink alcohol in moving cars.

And, just go look at some businesses in the Dallas/Fort Worth area. I've often noticed that some of them will have both a Texas flag and a U.S. flag out front -- every now and again, you'll notice the Texas flag is just a little bit larger and is flown just a bit higher than the United States one.

Of course, I doubt Texas will secede from the Union. That was tried by a few states in the South once upon a time and things didn't turn out too well for the rebels. Of course, with the U.S. military out policing the world...

Still, news out of Texas is often fun. The little CNN item about secession is no exception.

A bit of an apology

You good folks may have noticed a lot of paid posts as of late. For some reason, I've been getting sent a lot of opportunities to take those and I'm not good about turning down money. I'm sure my good fortune won't last long, so please be patient.

Before you know it, I'll be back to the same old rotten posts that I've always written.


Anonymous said...

I heard that on MSNBC tonight and just BUSTED OUT LAUGHING at how stupid RICK PERRY is here in Texas thinking that is going to happen HAHAHAHA..... He so needs to come back to Reality LOL!

--- Christopher

The Natural State Hawg said...

Christopher -- Funny stuff though huh? A governor talking about secession? Chuck Norris with a tongue-in-cheek xolumn about running for president of Texas?

You just can't make stuff like that up.

Danny Thornton said...

I almost feel out of my chair when I heard that.

The Natural State Hawg said...

Danny -- It would be action-packed nation with Norris in charge, that's for sure. Funny stuff...

Sherry said...

I've read that Texas has everything it needs to survive without the rest of the US, including oil.

The Natural State Hawg said...

Sherry -- True, but does it have the military might to thwart an invasion? It was pretty well established around 1860 that state's do not have the right of self determination.

Well, unless they're mad at the British...

HealthNutWannaBeDad said...

With no state income tax, among other things, I have heard more than one person say that if that scenario in Texas were to indeed take place, they would move there!

My wife is from Texas, and she said she would like nothing more than to move back to the Gulf Coast area. (But I want her to move to the beach in North Carolina!)



Eat Well. Live Well.

The Natural State Hawg said...

Paul -- It sounds like both of y'all want to live near an ocean, but you've made your home in Arkansas.

Now, that'll take some explaining!

Apollo said...

@The Natural State Hawg: Did you know that Texas is the only state in the union which is allowed to leave the union?

It is also the reason why a total of six flags four countries can be seen waiving from the state capitol.

So, Sherry had a good point that Texas can survive all on its own.

Just saying...

The Natural State Hawg said...

Apollo -- It's also the only state that is allowed to vote to split into five (I believe) separate states should the legislature so desire.

However, what is theoretically allowed and what would actually be allowed are two separate things.

All I'm saying is that a secessionist movement would likely result in an invasion. Why? In theory, states had the authority to secede from the Union, but that authority was revoked as a result of the War Between the States.

The whole topic of a Texas secession brings up a whole lot of possibilities and questions, doesn't it?

Harrison said...

It is posturing for the election against Kay this fall.

What do you mean paid posts?

The Natural State Hawg said...

Harrison -- Well, the two posts prior to this one were bought and paid for by the fine folks at Blogvertise and PayPerPost. It's EZ money and I can't resist...

Rebecca said...

Well, I say take advantage of the moment while the military is out playing global policemen, eh?

I'd vote for Walker, Texas Ranger in a SECOND. Where's the ballot?

Looking forward to more rotten posts... hehe.

The Natural State Hawg said...

Rebecca -- I'm not even sure you'd have an election. Chuck would take office and could only be removed if someone could whip him in a straight-up fight.

In other words, he'd be there for life ;)

Anonymous said...

Hawg-- INDEED! I was like OH MY GOD..... Is this state stupider than I thought in thinking thats gonna happen

Funny thing, on NEWS 8 ( WFAA) which is ABC here

70 something percent said NO they wont vote for a succession and think its STUPID

but 18 would vote for it



Apollo said...

@The Natural State Hawg: I agree that the Texas secession brings up a lot of possibilities and questions.

The Texas secession is not a theoretic one though as I believe it is a granted right and has never changed while all other states are prohibited from that.

As Christopher mentioned...70% are against it and I highly doubt it will actually happen but it is interesting to follow...who knows what may happen.